Unforeseen
by TR-Fanfic
Summary: Set during the series finale.  Harm, and all of their guests are waiting at McMurphy's.  Where is Mac?  Has she changed her mind?  Has she been called away?  Has something happened to her?  HM all the way.  Hearts are bent but not broken.


This story is in response to the HBX July 2007 challenge.

What if Harm and Mac's engagement night hadn't gone exactly as planned?

I'm going more realistically than the show did with time frames. I'm assuming they had a few months to report to their new duty stations, rather than just twelve hours.

I don't own JAG, but if I did I would have shown Mac meeting Harm's parents for the first time. Way earlier in their partnership than when this story is set.

Unforeseen

By TR

Rated Mild

A hundred familiar scents and sounds greeted Harm as he stepped through the door of McMurphy's Pub. People laughing, talking, the stench of fry grease and beer in the air, and someone on the juke box singing about having 100 years to live. He'd been there so many times before. Both with and without Mac. But this time was different. This time he'd walked in a changed man. He was no stranger to sex. He knew the scents and sounds and moves of the act. When to push harder, when to pull back, just when to whisper a sweet nothing in the ear of his companion. It wasn't tough to be a good bed mate. He'd been reasonably sure that he'd be able to please Mac, and she would please him. What had actually happened between them, however….It had floored him. Literally, the first time around. It floored him how the same scents and sounds and moves could impact him in such a profoundly different way. Touching Mac, her scent stamped against his skin, her answering caress burning him like a soul deep fire, her whispered promises, had knocked him for a loop. But what an exhilarating ride! He never knew it could be like this.

Taking a seat at the bar he smiled politely at the bar tender.

"What put that smile on your face?"

"I just got engaged. At least I think I did."

"Don't you think you should find out?"

His smile broadened, "That's kind of why I'm here."

His heart thumped just a little harder as he looked toward the door. Any moment Mac would walk in and his life would never be the same again. He chuckled, as he realized that that's exactly what had happened 9 years previous. Mac had walked into his life, and he'd never been the same since.

He straightened as the door opened, preparing to greet her, but faltered when he saw that it wasn't Mac, but a group of young women with chemically treated hair and glitter flecked skin. The woman in the center of the group had on a tiny pink half shirt that had a big fat 21 screen printed across her breasts. They walked by his bar stool, giving him the once over in turn. He mentally rolled his eyes. If those almost-grown women had any idea what kind of person he was waiting for, they'd run shrieking from the bar terrified by their own superficiality.

The next time the door opened, he smiled in recognition, but couldn't quell a slight feeling of disappointment.

"Captain!" Bud's jovial voice preceded him, and not for the first time Harm marveled at how happy Bud and Harriet looked together. He remembered talking to Mac about it years before. Wondering when Bud and Harriet ever found the time to be happy. He remembered her response as if it had been yesterday. 'They don't have to find time. They just are.'

"Congratulations!" Bud was saying. "This is turning into quite a special night."

He wanted to say that Bud had no idea how special it had already been, but he didn't. Bud may be pure of heart, but he wasn't clueless.

"Where's your bride to be?" Harriet asked, looking toward the ladies room.

He frowned and looked at his watch. "That's a good question. She should be here any time."

Harriet waved a hand. "You know how women are; she's probably still getting ready."

Harm nodded but said nothing. Yes, he knew how women were, and he knew how Mac was. She never spent more than 15 minutes getting ready for anything. He shifted in his seat, and hoped for the best.

"Drinks?" He asked.

They both smiled and placed their order, though Harm couldn't help but see Harriet glance worriedly toward the door.

Over the next hour, their co-workers had arrived and ordered drinks. Some of them had ordered food just to have something to do with their hands while they sat in wait. Others had taken to silently staring at the door as if willing her to open it and step through. No one looked at Harm.

Sighing he took his cell phone from his pocket. Dialing her number for the 10th time in as many minutes. For the 10th time it went directly to voicemail. "You've reached Sarah Mackenzie, I am currently unavailable…" He cancelled the call and set the phone on the bar, not feeling the need to leave another message.

If she was stuck in traffic, she'd have called. If she was called away on an emergency, she would have called. If she'd changed her mind…No, she wouldn't stand him up like this. Even if everything she'd whispered to him while she clung to him, while he was inside her, while she moved over him, was a lie, she wouldn't humiliate him this way. She'd never abandoned him. Every time they were separated, he was the one to leave. Even when she'd left JAG, she'd kept in touch. Something was wrong.

He was two seconds from grabbing his keys and scouring the city for her, when his cell phone rang. Everyone in the group fell silent.

"Harmon Rabb?"

"This is he," he said, swallowing down a lump that was rapidly forming in his throat.

"Sarah Mackenzie's been in an accident."

His eyes fell shut, as his mind flashed to 5 months previous, driving like a madman through the snow trying to get to her.

"Where is she? How bad is it?"

"We're in an ambulance on the way to Bethesda now."

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

"We're still a few minutes out."

He frowned. "Where did you find her?"

"She was the center car in a three car collision heading north on the 14th street bridge."

"North? What was she..? She was supposed to be meeting me…" He trailed off, knowing that the paramedic wouldn't have any answers for him. "Okay. I'm on my way. Is she conscious?"

"Barely."

"Let her know I'm coming to her."

"Will do."

He snapped the phone shut, reached for his wallet, threw some money on the bar, and hit the ground running. Somehow before he was out the door, he'd managed to tell them all where he was going.

They'd kept him forever at the front desk of the ER, until he finally insisted on speaking to the paramedic that brought her in. A pimply faced boy appeared. Looking no more than 18 years old. Barely out of high school, if at all. His uniform was covered in blood.

"Mr. Rabb?"

"Yes. Is…is that her blood? Is she okay?"

"She's broken her leg. Has lacerations, and bruising over most of her body. She's lost a lot of blood, but we've got it under control."

"Can I see her? Did you tell her I was coming?"

The young EMT nodded, and hit the lever for the automatic doors. "I told her, but I'm not sure if she heard me. Come this way."

He heard her cry out the moment he stepped into the hallway. His steps quickened until he was at a near run. His dress shoes clapping loudly against the cold polished tile. They slid to a stop outside her room. Two doctors were leaning over her. One held her leg, the other tried to calm her. Blood dripped from the bed, from her wounds. He could see her hands clasped, white knuckled around the bed rails. The second time she cried out, he was at her side.

"Can't you give her something for the pain?" He asked.

"We have. She's breaking through it. We wanted to give her more, but she said no."

He turned to Mac. Stroked her tangled hair away from her face. "I'm here Mac."

"Harm?"

"It's me. You have to let them give you more pain meds."

Her voice was raspy with pain. "I wanted to be awake. I was… waiting for you. Waiting to tell you. I…I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"It's okay. I know. It's alright. Let them give you something."

She took his hand, and clasped it with bone bending force, crying out again as they tried to set her leg. Harm winced and looked at the doctor. "She just about broke my fingers. Wait until she's knocked out to finish that."

He leaned down toward Mac. "I'm going to have them sedate you. Is that okay?"

She nodded slightly. A bead of sweat trickled down her forehead. He mopped it up with a cool cloth and kissed her skin. In seconds she was unconscious.

Harm turned to the doctors. "How bad is it?"

"We don't know yet. We need you to give us some room. We'll let you know as soon as we're finished."

He nodded. "Okay. Please...if she wakes up let her know I'm still here."

They agreed, and he stepped out and headed into the waiting room. All of them were there. They'd followed him in a caravan from McMurphy's. Waited to hear that she'd survived. He fielded questions. He must have as they all gathered around, but later he couldn't remember a word anyone had said. Even himself. All he knew, all he could see was her broken body crying out in that bed. And the paramedic's voice in his ear telling him where she'd been found. She'd been driving away from McMurphy's. Away from him. Why?

Hours later he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up to see a doctor in sweat soaked scrubs. "Mr Rabb?" At Harm's nod, he continued. "She was very lucky. She's badly bruised, but no internal bleeding. The lacerations on her arms and abdomen are superficial and should heal within a few weeks. Most of her blood loss was due to a compound fracture of her tibia. It's broken in two places. From what the paramedics told us this was most likely caused by her foot being lodged between the seat and the door, before the impact of the second vehicle. Right now we have her stabilized. We had to operate and place a rod in her leg and two screws into her ankle. It will take a few months to heal."

"But she's going to be okay?"

"Providing there are no surprises. Yes."

Harm nearly deflated with relief. "Can I see her?"

"We'll let you know when she's out of recovery."

An hour later he was sitting next to Mac's bed, resting his cheek on his fist. He'd nearly nodded off when he heard her whisper. "You look like hell."

He sat up and immediately reached for a cup of water. "Yeah, and you're really the picture of health. Drink this."

She gratefully took the straw in her mouth and sipped. "Thank you." She reached out, fingering the sleeve of his white jacket. "You're still in your fancies Captain Rabb. Have you even been home at all?"

"No."

"Why not?"

He frowned. "I…I thought you'd want me to stay with you."

She tried to sit up. "Hey," she said softly. "I do want you here. Of course I do. But I was in surgery for 5 hours. I'm just surprised you haven't changed your clothes. Have you eaten?"

"I couldn't."

Her eyes warmed. "Harm, I'm going to be okay now. Please take care of yourself." She gestured to the elevated cast on her leg. "I have enough to worry about. I don't want to have to worry over you too."

He tried to give her a smile. "I promise."

"Harm?"

"Yeah?"

"I really am sorry." She hesitated, watching his face. Confused at how guarded he'd become in just the last few minutes. "About not making it to McMurphy's. I know a lot of people were there."

"Yeah. That's what you said before." He looked away. "It's okay Mac." He gave her hand a brief squeeze and let go. "I'm just glad you're going to be okay." Standing he pointed to the door. "I uh...now that I know that you're okay…I'm going to go get changed."

"Okay," she said slowly. Studying him. He didn't look at her.

"I'll be back in a few minutes."

At that he was gone. She wondered what was going on in that head of his. Was he pulling back because of the stress of it all? As he'd done when Mattie was injured. Did he need to just regroup and catch his breath, or was there more to it than that?

Whatever it was, she was going to have to wait for answers. Exhaustion began to take over, and she fell into a troubled sleep.

Harm had returned shortly, in a pair of comfortable sweats and a Go Navy T shirt. He'd watched her for the longest time. She was in a deep and obviously uncomfortable sleep, her forehead was set in a crease of constant distress. He tried to sooth her, but it wasn't any use. His touch didn't seem to be the balm that she needed.

He had questions. Questions that he may never get the answers to. Was this finally it for them? For the life of him he couldn't think of why she'd have been driving that direction. He'd taken the time to look through her personal effects, and saw a bloody red dress, cut up the side where they'd had to access her injuries. She's been dressed up. To meet him? Yes, he was sure of that, but why was she going the other way? Had she had a change of heart?

She shifted in her sleep, and moaned in pain. He moved closer, murmuring soft words of comfort. This time it seemed to settle her. His heart went out to her. No matter the reason she'd been on that road, she was still the love of his life. He'd see her through this, even if it was the last time he ever saw her again.

A week later Mac sat up in her own bed surrounded by books and flowers. Harm had set up a TV in there with a remote close by. On the side of the bed was a TV tray stacked with her breakfast dishes. She lifted her arms to brush out her wet hair and noticed a marked difference in the soreness and muscle fatigue in her back. Maybe she was beginning to recover after all. Her doctor had told her she was doing remarkably well, but until now she couldn't feel much of a difference. She'd still felt like someone had put her in an industrial strength dryer to spin for a year or so. The bruises on her skin didn't look so angry, but they still felt like they had a few more bones to pick before they were through.

She finished with her hair and set her brush on the night table. Looking down at the waterproof cast cover on her leg, she thought about Harm. He'd gotten that for her the day she'd come home. Knowing she'd want to be able to shower and bathe without having to hang her leg painfully out of the tub. It was a really remarkable invention. He'd slipped it on her leg and shown her how to activate the vacuum seal. She'd been only paying half attention at the time, as Harm's hand rested high on her thigh. Her skin seemed to soak in his warmth, and spread from where he was touching her, to the center of her body. She'd closed her eyes, reveling in the feeling. Only to be snapped back to reality by his voice.

"Mac?..Mac! Are you listening? This is important."

"Yeah, uh…sorry, what were you saying?"

"I was teaching you how to activate the vacuum seal. Where were you just now?"

I was making love to you in my mind, she thought, but kept that to herself. "Um…it's nothing, I just spaced out for a second."

"Anyway, this is how you do it…" He'd gone on to explain, but she still hadn't paid much attention. She was too busy wondering why she was melting into a puddle by his hand simply resting on her thigh, and he didn't seem one bit affected by her. In fact he hadn't seemed "affected" by her in that fashion since the accident. She'd looked in the mirror. She knew that her face and body looked bruised and battered, but that had never stopped Harm from looking at her before. There were times in the past that all she really lived on were the looks he would send her way. The longing in his eyes that he would never act on. Now he was perfectly free to act on anything he wanted, and the longing was gone. In it's place was guardedness. An underlying pain. He was gentle enough. Yet remained at a distance. His touches were those of a caretaker. His kisses perfunctory. Why?

She smoothed her hair back, adjusted her tank top and boxsie pajamas and tried not to be bored out of her mind. She'd read all of the books that were in there. TV and magazines didn't really appeal to her. She wanted company.

"Harm!"

He appeared in the doorway with a dish towel over his shoulder. "Hey."

She smiled at him. "Hey."

"What do you need?" He walked around the side of the bed and began to gather her dishes. "You ate all of your breakfast. That's good."

"Yeah, I actually felt hungry today. Why don't you put those down for a minute," she said, gesturing to the stack of dishes on the tray.

"I'm in the middle of loading the dishwasher, it'll only take a minute."

"But that's not why I called you in here, I just wanted to…" Her voice trailed off as he walked out of the room with the tray. "…talk to you." She finished.

She waited exactly ten minutes, and when he didn't return, she called for him again. This time he came in with a box of dryer sheets in his hand. Before he could gather her laundry, she held up her hand.

"Come here."

He frowned. "Is everything okay? I'm just finishing up some chores."

"I know what you're doing. I want you to come here." She said gently, patting the space next to her on the bed.

When he sat down next to her, she took the dryer sheets from him and placed them on the night table.

She watched him for a long moment. He seemed…restless.

"Are you happy Harm?"

"Hell, when do I have the time to be happy?"

"You either are or you aren't." She cocked her head to the side. "And you're not are you? Something's going on, and I want to know what it is."

He did his best to look baffled. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me. Something's on your mind."

He pursed his lips. "I don't know what to tell you Mac."

"Tell me what you told the last time you were beside my bed. On Christmas Eve."

"What did I say?"

She swallowed hard, pushing the lump in her throat back down into her chest. "You said, 'nothing's changed, I'm still here.'"

He frowned. "Mac? Why would I need to say that. Nothing has changed. I am still here."

"Are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, why are you sleeping on the couch instead of with me?"

"I'm all knees and elbows, I don't want to hurt you."

"We've slept together before, and you didn't seem to be 'all knees and elbows' then." He gave her a sheepish smile that didn't quite fill his face.

"That's because I never really slept. I was always concentrating on keeping my hands to myself."

She smiled back, just a little. "Well you don't have to keep your hands to yourself now."

"You have injuries."

"Not everywhere."

"I don't want to hurt you," he repeated.

"Then why are you pulling away from me?"

His mouth dropped open in shock. "Pulling away from you? Mac, I've been here every day since your accident."

"I know," She said softly. "Taking care of me. You've been amazing. But…"

"But?"

"When was the last time you kissed me?"

He frowned, and looked like he was fighting the urge to take her temperature. "Every time I come in the room."

"On the forehead. When's the last time you really kissed me? When's the last time we had more than a three word conversation that didn't have to do with my injuries?" She swallowed hard, and her voice dropped to a whisper. "When I tried to kiss you last night, you pulled away. When I told you I loved you, you just smiled."

He took her hand. "I'm sorry. I was just busy. Between you and Mattie and trying to work out the logistics on our promotions…"

"You don't have to be here Harm." When his face fell she rushed to continue. "I mean, I love having you here, and you're taking very good care of me, but if you have other things you need to do, I've been offered in-home care. I can…"

"No. I'll take care of you."

"I'd rather have someone else here to do this sort of thing," she gestured toward the dryer sheets. "…and be able to really talk to you when you're here. Than to have you doing everything and over extending yourself." She ran a hand through her hair. "That's not all. It's…I…" She sighed, trying to put the intangible into words. "I feel you distancing yourself from me." She rested her hands over her heart. "I feel it Harm."

He hung his head, and cursed himself for not addressing it sooner. With her level of intuition, he should have known that she would pick up on it.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"Sorry for what?" Fear shook her voice.

He raised his eyes and saw hers fill with tears. "Oh Mac. Hey, come here." Carefully he put his arms around her. "I'm sorry," he whispered again, and pulled back just far enough to kiss her. His mouth moved over hers softly, slowly. Mindful of her bruises he stroked the skin of her neck and jaw. He ended the kiss just as gently, and wiped the tears from cheeks. "I do love you. Please don't ever think that I don't."

She nodded. "What's going on?"

"The paramedics told me that you were headed North on the 14th street bridge when you had your accident."

"I was."

His brow creased. "And I was waiting at McMurphy's."

Understanding finally dawned on her. "Harm…Why didn't you just ask me about this when I woke up in the hospital?"

"You'd just been through surgery, I didn't want to come at you with questions. We'd decided to get married. I thought that's what you wanted, but if it wasn't, if you didn't…don't really want that…anymore. Then it wasn't the time or the place to have that kind of discussion."

"You should have asked me."

"It just never seemed to be the right time."

"I've been on the mend for the last week, you had plenty of opportunities."

He looked away. "I guess I just didn't want to hear your answer."

She shook her head. "Harm, look at me." When he complied, she continued. "You really think I would just leave you standing there waiting at McMurphy's? What kind of person do you think I am? Even if I'd changed my mind, which I haven't, I wouldn't have stood you up like that?"

"I didn't think you would, I just didn't know what else to think either. I just…That's part of why I didn't say anything. You hadn't told me you changed your mind, so I let it go."

"Except you didn't let it go. Is this how it's going to be? Are you going to doubt me whenever something comes up that you don't have an explanation for?"

"That's not how it's going to be."

"Good, because I don't have anything to hide from you." She took his hand. "I swear to God I wasn't leaving you. I can't even think about leaving you without my stomach dropping to my feet. I was going to get your ring."

"My ring?"

She nodded. "We hadn't finished our ring 'negotiations' when we'd decided to go to McMurphy's. Remember?"

"Yeah I remember."

"On my way back to my place I called and ordered it. A friend of mine owns a jewelry shop over there, and I called in a favor for her to open it for me. I already knew your ring size. Don't ask me how. It's just probably one of those things that I hoped I'd need to know at some point in the future. It's not tough to pick out a wedding band. So I ordered it sight unseen." She squeezed his hand. "I should have been back just in time to meet you. I don't remember the accident. The next thing I knew a paramedic was leaning over me in an ambulance telling me you were coming to me at the hospital."

"So you did hear him?"

"Yes I did."

Their eyes locked for a long moment, reconnecting. Then they moved together in unison. Words would have tarnished the magic, so they remained silent. Mouth met mouth. Careful hands caressed delicate skin. Answering strokes moved from shoulder to hip to shoulder again. He moved in close. Lifted her, and she settled comfortably against his chest.

"The laundry can wait Harm," he heard her whisper. "Let me stay here like this."

He dropped a kiss on her forehead, and closed his eyes. "Absolutely."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

End of scene. Good? Bad? Otitis Media? Let me know.


End file.
